How to Stop Making Mistakes

Written by: Ashley Fern

We all start somewhere - and it's not all rainbows and sunshine. For everything that we are adept at doing now, we began with baby (often clumsy) steps.

From time to time, we take up new challenges which we aren't familiar with, whether it's a new phase in life, a new job, or a new hobby. And sometimes we fail miserably, or make ridiculous mistakes, which can be extremely disheartening.

We'd feel like giving up, look for confidantes to pour our insecurities to, then try and forget the feeling of stupidity and push onwards.

"Trust in the process; you'll get there."

"It happens, try not to let it get to you!"

"Don't take it personally :)"

"Well, at least once bitten, twice shy, right?"

These are things we'd commonly hear from the people around us when we mess up, hit a rut and seek their counsel. And though well-meaning, it doesn't really help with the situation.

Here's what YOU can do for yourself, to (1) feel less stupid, (2) feel more prepared, and (3) ensure you BECOME less stupid.

Step 1: Write it Down as a "Note to Self"

Avid journal writers will be nodding their heads enthusiastically at this. Long-touted to help create mental clarity and manage emotions, journaling is a common tool for general wellbeing and personal development. But journaling is NOT what I am recommending for this concrete improvement plan.

I have always kept a notebook by me to jot down ideas, plans or reminders. I find it is much, much more useful to write down the mistake in the form of a reminder. Let's take my rookie mistake sending emails as an example. I didn't include the attachment to the email, and I didn't "cc" (carbon-copy) the correct recipients. It didn't land me in hot waters, but it was majorly embarrassing. I felt stupid for days.

Here's how my "Note to Self" looks like:

Next time, please send attachments along with the email, and check email recipients.

This helps me feel in control, because now I have committed to doing the right thing next time. I am facing the negative incident head-on, which helps relieve feelings of embarrassment and overwhelm. I learned the hard way that avoidance simply sets me up for a repeat-mistake; because by not acknowledging the mistake, I don't learn from it.

Still, this is merely the first iteration of the "Note to Self". It usually ends up in my junk log where I simply jot down notable happening, which rapidly fills up as the days go by. To ensure it doesn't get forgotten, this is where Step 2 comes in.

Step 2: Turn it into an Action Plan

If you've read Atomic Habits by James Clear, you'd know the basics of how to create good habits. In this case, it is to make the "Note to Self" into a specific, clear action plan. It should have a cue, an existing habit, and the new habit you want to insert.

Format of Action Plan:

When [situation happens], and I am [doing task], then I should be [doing/checking that].

Here's how my Action Plan looks like:

When there is an email I must send to the client, and I am about the hit "send", then I should be checking if I have "cc"-ed all relevant personnel and attached all documents required.

To ensure I know what to do when the situation arises, I tend to place little action plans like these in their dedicated note sections. On my work computer, I use OneNote and open a sub-page for large responsibilities (i.e. preparing tax returns), then set up sections for specific tasks (e.g. requesting client information). In this case, this action plan goes under the "Email" section under the "Info Request" sub-page.

Step 3: Build a System

1. Repeat steps 1 & 2 consistently.

2. Build an organised database/manual: categorise your Action Plans neatly.

3. Every time you do a related task, check your notes.

This improvement plan has been working for me only because I have consistently stuck to it. I started my new job a few months ago and felt absolutely lost. It seemed like I wasn't doing anything right, and made quite a few mistakes. But as I learned and started compiling my action plans, I started getting better and more efficient at what I do. At this point, I've built a 3-page instruction manual of action plans, all neatly categorised into tasks.

Every time I do any email-related tasks, I skim through my "Email" action plans to ensure I miss nothing out. It prevents repeat-mistakes, and helps me feel a lot less stressed about what needs to be done.

This is what has been working for me, in the years I have challenged myself to new activities and undertakings. I hope that this would serve you well, too.

Cheers to getting over feeling stupid, and BECOMING less stupid (i.e. learning) 🥂

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